Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
