Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
