So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
