Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
