he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
