Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
