Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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