"it" just moved
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize
