Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
