just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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