honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
