Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
