This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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