Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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