I hate all girls vehemently.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
