Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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