my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize