if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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