"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
