At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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