HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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