In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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