I think I can smell my own vagina right now
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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