It's like a parade of train wrecks.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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