so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
