He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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