She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
