i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
