"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
