We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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