I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
