The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
