I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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