I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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