I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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