let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
