WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize