honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.
That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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