apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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