they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Pappa wants mamma naked
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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