you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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