He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
