So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Dick very happy bro
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
