Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I have grass duct taped all over my body
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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