I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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