Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
