and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
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He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
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You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
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