It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
