You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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