You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He? As in you personified your dick?
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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