I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
