Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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