his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
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The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
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We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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